The Right Way

Ice Cream Metaphor

People can experience the same things differently, I get that. I eat an ice cream and I feel happy and satisfied, someone else will eat the exact same ice cream and be confused at the appeal of the cold milky snack and want to throw it in the bin. Maybe I work in an ice cream factory and am sick of eating the left over ice creams, or maybe I have never had an ice cream before and my first try is heavenly. Perspectives on the ice cream differ. Every single person experiences it differently and their experiences are all valuable no matter their background. The ice cream factory worker knows more about ice cream, but that doesn't make the experience of a first time ice cream taster less correct.

I started thinking about this concept of how valuable and authentic one experience is compared to another when I was reflecting on my own experience living in Chile. From travel blogs I have read recently, it seems that my situation is quite unique. Not many foreigners get to live inside another culture like I am right now.

"My Situation":

• Sharing an apartment with Chileans.
• Having only Chilean friends and acquaintances.
• Being immersed in Chilean culture whenever I'm not alone or on Skype.
• Using Spanish everyday to communicate my thoughts and feelings.

These things have their advantages and disadvantages. Living with locals does give you a different perspective and lets you see things that are way outside the Lonely Planet version of a country. But are they more real and valuable than the three day tour version?

Foreigner Bubble

When I lived in China for a total of about three years I never lived within Chinese culture the way I am living within Chilean culture now. Sure, I ate Chinese food regularly, I practiced my Chinese with locals, I encountered strange and interesting things about the culture, etc. However I was always experiencing these things from the outside. I didn't live with a Chinese family, I didn't have many Chinese friends, so I found parts of my own culture within China to relate to and enjoy. Basically I lived in a foreigner bubble version of China.

I'd like to point out that I had a fabulous time in that bubble. I made amazing friends, experienced new things, and learnt a lot about the world. The foreigner bubble isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it did keep me at an arm's length from the country I was living in.

This realisation of how different my 'foreigner life' in China was compared to my current 'local life' in Chile makes me wonder if my Chinese experience would have been more valuable and authentic if I was immersed in everyday Chinese life. Definitely, my Chinese language skills would be much more advanced. After three months in Chile with no prior Spanish training (except a few months on Memrise) I have conversational Spanish and a basic hold on grammar. Getting to that level in Chinese took me three years. Another difference is that I would have learnt more about Chinese culture from observing those around me 24 hours a day rather than reading about it in a book or hearing another expat's perspective on a certain tradition.

On the other hand I wouldn't have connections all around the world, like I do now, if I lived in a local context, and I probably still wouldn't know that Turkmenistan exists. And maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't have enjoyed myself as much. I wonder whether I would have kept on returning to China after an intense cultural experience? Being all of 14 when I first visited China, I think I would have been quite shocked at the prospect of being put into a completely Chinese environment and that may not have had the best impact on my excitement for China. But who knows.

Living like a Local

The fact is that living as a local, for all its value, is hard. First of all, how do you get into this situation? It's not an easy feat. I remember having a deep desire to connect with locals and share with them in China. I looked for avenues to achieve this goal- hobbies, clubs, language exchanges, etc. It doesn't always work out how you think it will, and it requires a lot of persistence to find a local who:

a) isn't using you for English speaking practice,
b) is cool, and
c) wants to hang out with you.

I guess that's why a lot of people pay good money to do home-stay programs and immersion internships. (My first solo trip to China was through a volunteer organisation, Lattitude Global Volunteering.) My Chilean pathway to living in a local environment was less planned: I fell in love with a Chilean. He has been kind enough to show me his country and I am grateful everyday for his help in understanding his homeland and its people. I know I am very lucky to be able to share this experience with him. Many people don't get the chance to live like a local when they travel overseas and their experiences contain completely different content because of that.

Your Version

Imagine all the different impressions foreigners can have of a single country. Your thoughts on China or New Zealand, for example, are almost certainly going to be different to mine. Some people travel on tours, others with their parents, some backpack without plans. Budgets differ, time frames differ, reasons for travelling differ too. Which version is the best? Which combination produces the most reliable presentation of a country? All of them happen, all are true, yet they result in different experiences, good and bad, and varied images of a place. Local is one way. Foreigner bubble is another way. Tourist another.

Cajón Del Maipo - The Perfect Barbecue

If you are looking for a peaceful escape close to Santiago, Chile, Cajón Del Maipo is what you’re looking for. Only an hour outside the city, this beautiful valley has many different picnic areas and riverside retreats for soaking in the natural ambiance. I visited a picnic area called "El Manzano" and I can honestly say out of all the barbecues I have experienced in Chile so far, and believe me there have been a lot, this was my favourite. In four words: quiet, green, fresh, natural.

Buses come out here for tourists and there’s heaps of room for parking cars. There are barbecue areas (without the grill, so you might want to bring your own), tables, chairs, and bathrooms too.

Here are some pictures so you can get a better idea.

Amazing Scenery

Beer, chips, shade. The essentials.

Four person barbecue, cooked with charcoal

Lovely (freezing) water cascading down off the mountain tops

Up above. See anything?

Barbecues and picnics are great aren't they? Especially in a place like this. All you do is cook, eat, chat, take in some sun and let the good times roll. Looking forward to the Chilean Summer.

Learning Spanish in Chile : The First Two Months

Learning a new language is a big task, whatever the language. It is also my favourite part of travelling. Although it can be tiring and slightly overwhelming at times, communicating with someone using a whole new language system is very rewarding. In my opinion, living immersed in the language you are learning is the quickest way to learn it because your environment encourages you (forces you) to engage with the language almost all day and night. This is great as it gives you instant motivation to practice the language and improve your language skills rapidly. As soon as you step outside there are opportunities to practice, it almost takes more energy to not speak and read and communicate with locals.

Learning Spanish in Chile has been interesting. A lot of people, even Chileans themselves, say that they speak Spanish badly. Definitely the accent here is quite different from the CD ROM that comes with your standard Spanish textbook, with the omission of certain sounds, a huge amount of slang and a kind of closed mouth form. However as an Australian, I can hardly complain about all these things. Australian English is often described quite similarly. The Chilean accent is just that, an accent, after a while your ears will get use to the sound.

Looking back over the first two months of my time in Chile, I have definitely come a long way since I arrived. My Spanish learning journey started with my first hot shower... I remember looking down at the taps and seeing an “F” and a “C”. I already knew the word for cold, frio, so that was easy, and I thought I knew the word for hot, calor, done and done. However during the next few days I noticed that things like water, food and heaters were described as caliente, and so I put two and two together and understood that the C in the shower was for caliente not calor! Am I blowing your mind right now? Ok, just let me get past my first jet lag influenced epiphany… This was when I realised that everything was going to be in Spanish from now on, even small details like hot and cold taps.

In the first few weeks of living in Chile I noticed things like this everywhere and it was so much fun because my level of Spanish was so low that my rate of improvement felt so fast: There was nowhere to go but up! Everywhere I looked were new words. Driving into town I couldn’t help but read every single sign I saw, my eyes were in hyper drive, as my brain attempted guessing the meaning of the passing shopfront of Santiago.

After a while I realised I needed a structure way to study and so I bought a book: “Easy Spanish - Step by Step” by Barbara Bregstein. This was a good choice and I would recommend the book to anyone at a beginner Spanish level. I did a few chapters a week and in less than a month I was able to have basic conversations (with very little grammar), and I was being understood without playing charades, which is always a good feeling.

At that point my listening skills were way ahead of my speaking, reading and writing skills as I was exposed to so much conversation every day that I guess I absorbed new words by osmosis. This put me in a unique mute position. I could grasp the gist of what was being said (with a few holes here and there) but I was unable to join the conversation and express my opinions and experiences. Surprisingly, it takes more than a month to be fluent in Spanish! So without the gift of the Spanish gab I took to observing Chilean culture from an outsider’s perspective and tried to learn as much as possible. I also started this blog to make sure I didn’t forget my observations.

After two months (right now) I am able to have slightly more intermediate conversations using conjugations in the present tense and using a small selection of verbs in the past tense. I have also learnt common phrases and slang to throw into conversation to fake fluency. I think I fool some people, although having blonde hair doesn’t help the charade...

To validate my claims of speaking a bit of Spanish I present to you the proof: Last night I made a friend. A Chilean friend who doesn’t speak a word of English! I proved that I can have a 15 minute conversation with a local without any misunderstanding. Very satisfying. It’s things like that, connecting with people face to face, that motivate me to keep going, to get better so that I can understand my new friend better and learn something from them.

Making these small connections and sharing with people from different walks of life is a big part of why I enjoy travelling. It helps me to understand the world and reflect on my own life with greater clarity.

Expectations

They can change everything.

Having high expectations can lower satisfaction with reality. Having low expectations can increase satisfaction with reality.

Doing research to inform these expectations can decrease the chance of dissatisfaction, however then you lose the feeling of surprise. But then again, its pretty hard to calculate the result of a surprise, good or bad, other factors such as likes and dislikes and sense of humour also contribute. Anyway, back to expectations.

Expectations change with experience and repetition over time.

The first time you are unsatisfied with an experience that didn’t meet your expectations you feel like crap. The second time you have a similar experience your expectations will align more closely with reality and you won’t feel as crap. The more you experience, the more realistic your expectations will be. Once you have had a similar experience 10 times you might be prepared to really enjoy that experience whereas before you might have been frustrated and annoyed, or at least uncomfortable.

Do you remember the first time you played Mario Kart? Try to think back. Do you remember turning the controller upside down to the right and left to try to help you make the tight corners on the race track? Well I do... But did it actually help? No. And the fact that it didn’t do anything, even though you were using this physical technique, was really frustrating and annoying. After playing the game for a while you started to learn other ways to stay on the track such as steeling with the joystick, braking on corners and not hitting bombs or skidding on bananas. Then you started to learn from your mistakes and enjoyed playing the game more and more until you fell in love with the game. BUT THEN the wii comes out and they tell you that you can use the physical turning method! This just messes with your expectations all over again. However in time you get use to it and can’t help but love Mario Kart just as much as before.

You can only change your expectations through experience.

Its tempting to think to yourself “ok, I’ll keep my expectations low, because I don’t want to be disappointed”, I have done this before and have expected it to work. Funny thing is that your brain knows that you are trying to trick yourself so unfortunately your expectations don’t change at all. It doesn't work.

If I am excited to see a movie and I think it will be awesome, I can only change this expectation if I have other information; like if someone tells me its a dull movie, then I can take that experience and put it together with my expectations and they will be modified. If I know that my expectations are high and I want to lower them, this is irrelevant, I can’t change them until I know something that will affect them. This works well for movie marketing people when they are putting together a trailer/preview for a new film. If they are good at their jobs, they can give you information that will increase your expectations and make you want to see the movie and ultimately, give them money.

Sometimes your expectations don’t help you come to love a video game or convince you to pay money for a terrible movie with a great trailer. Sometimes your expectations can affect your everyday routine and make a big difference. I have experienced this difference after arriving in a new country and settling in. Adapting to life in a different culture requires patience. It takes time to realign your expectations with reality, and this can be a pleasant or an uncomfortable process depending on your personal culture and your expectations of the country you are adapting to.

How do expectations affect your life?

Chile and Australia: Cultural Differences

The South American country of Chile is a long way from Australia and naturally there are quite a few cultural differences between the two places. From living in Santiago for two months, below are 13 differences that I have noticed. Don't agree? Have more to add? Leave a comment. Tell me your thoughts!

Completo Italiano with Mini Empanadas

 1. Eating habits - 

• 8am: Typical Breakfast: bread with cheese
• 1:30pm: Typical Lunch: Meat Carbs Meat Carbs Meat Carbs and Salad . Usually the biggest meal of the day
• 8pm: Typical Supper: Bread and cheese or eggs. Very light.
• Avocado and tomato are also extremely popular for a sandwich at any time of the day.
• Tea is taken without milk.

2. Socialising - Aussies will often meet for a coffee to catch up on life for an hour or so. For Chileans this is unacceptable, a minimum of five hours should be set aside for any social gathering. I have been to a bbq that lasted for 14 hours. It can be quite intense.

3. There is so much English music on the radio in Chile, people know English songs from The Beatles to the Police to the Foo Fighters. Mainstream stations in Australia hardly ever have foreign language content, except maybe gangnam style or the macarena.

4. Outside + standing up at night. An essential Chilean experience is a bbq or 'asado' with friends or family. This involves building a fire in a bbq with wood or coal outside, waiting for it to get to the right temperature, cooking a great amount of meat and eating it straight from the grill when its juicy and delicious! Meanwhile everyone is standing around drinking pisco for literally hours. Doesn't matter if its cold outside, People like to hang outside.

5. Junk food is relatively healthy in Chile. Completo italiano, churrasco? They come with avocado and tomato. Sopaypillas? They’re made from pumpkin! 

6. Almost everyone smokes tobacco and its very common for young people to smoke marijuana together. This might be a reason why they dig hanging outside.

7. Talking bullshit- yeah, we both like to do it, but its different. Chileans tell long crazy stories, Aussies are very sarcastic.

8. Drink preferences - Chileans love pisco. I mean love love love pisco. will drink it every night for the rest of their lives. The 'promo' one buys for a night out includes a 2 litre bottle of coke and a bottle of Chilean Pisco. (That Peruvian stuff is apparently VERY different)

Also wine. Waiters will ask if you want wine, and if you say yes, they will bring red without asking. Wine = red wine in Chile.

9. Sports - Football is like a religion in Chile. You won’t find any cricket or netball comps here! Also Chileans work a lot, their hours are much longer, so fitting in sport and exercise isn't the number one priority.

10. Gender roles - although it varies from household to household, generally I've noticed women of around 50 years take care of more feminine activities such as cleaning, cooking etc.

11. Kisses on the cheek to say hello. Even kids do it in Chile! I find myself forgetting to initial this ritual probably offending and making bad impressions. Oops!

12. Chileans are generally open to commitment, helping, being involved as soon as they are asked. Aussies can be distant when asked if they will help out of be part of a new business idea or plan, needing more time to decide. 

13. Dogs in the streets. They are cute, friendly, and their only home is the streets of Santiago. I guess Australia’s snipping regulations are pretty strict.

For more information on Chilean culture check out the following links:

• http://www.reachtoteachrecruiting.com/guides/chile/chilean-culture/
• http://www.kwintessential.co.uk/resources/global-etiquette/chile.html
• http://cachandochile.wordpress.com/
• http://wanderingtrader.com/travel-blog/chile-travel-blog/
• http://fathomaway.com/photostory/local-obsessions-chilean-street-art/
• http://www.expatexchange.com/chile/liveinchile.html

Mil Tambores - Valparaiso

Hot Hippy Spirit

Is your culture cold or warm?

 A common way to describe people is by temperature.  “They are very cold people”, “Everyone here is so warm”. What does it take to be part of the cold group or the warm group? Is one group better than the other? Why do people use this adjective like this?

I think many of us have heard certain nationalities described as “cold”. However, I don’t think this is a racist expression, but one which might show a lack of understanding and also a specific recognition that a cultural difference exists between you and the person you are describing. Throughout my life I have often heard “cold” refer to Russians or Eastern Europeans and not knowing anything about Russian life or culture, I unknowingly accepted this as a fitting description. Recently I have heard Chileans describing Chinese people as cold. This labelling of Chinese people as cold made me start to question the expression, its meaning and validity, as I, having lived in and studied Chinese culture, would not describe them as cold.

People being labelled as “cold” could have something to do with the climate of a certain country or region. From what I can tell Russia is very cold in winter, pictures of Siberia spring to mind. Maybe people in colder climates spend more time indoors with their families rather than outside with others and this affects their ‘warmth’ or closeness with others when they see them. However there are quite a few exceptions to this climate stereotype. For example, I have never heard Canadians be described as cold, and I know they get a fair amount of snow every year.

It could have something to do with your style of interaction with other people. Introverted people can be described as cold because they might not desire to communicate or to spend extended periods of time with other people in “conventional” environments. Shy people too, people who don’t speak that specific language well, people who are sick or tired and so remain distant. In this way ‘cold’ is used to distance certain styles of interaction while the more “mainstream” styles are interpreted as correct. Sometimes this use of ‘cold’ is specific to individuals rather than a large group of people which is interesting. The word cold can be used in both contexts without question. Stereotyping is so vague that one word can describe an entire group of people; millions of citizens, and these simple, one word descriptions, images and perspectives all influence the way we view and interact with other cultures.

It could also refer to physical interaction. Cold weather is also said to be ‘frigid’, being unable to enjoy sexual contact. So extrapolating from that, people who don’t touch or kiss as a natural social behaviour tend to be described as cold. In this sense physical contact is interpreted as a positive personality trait.

Maybe cold is a word that expresses a negative alternative to ones cultural comfort zone. I’m thinking that generally people from ‘warm’, touchy, louder cultures are the ones that use this word, ‘cold’, as a negative adjective. Why not use the word ‘shy’ or ‘reserved’? Probably because people are somewhat afraid of the unknown culture they are dealing with and so tend to push it away with a type of insult.

For all we know touching and kissing (for greetings or during a friendly conversation) could be a dangerous habit for spreading infection. Talking a lot, asking a lot of questions and loudly, could be disrespectful to a host or push boundaries of relationships in certain cultures. Until you have put in the time to figure out a culture, you will never know. If people studied other cultures they wouldn’t see the way people act as strange and negative, they would just know that in that culture there are different ways of expressing your mood and personality.

The words we use to describe others shed light on our own cultures, personalities, perspectives and knowledge.