What’s with all the family?

From what I have experienced of Chilean and Argentinian culture, which may be similar to the rest of Latin America, is that family is super important.

So important that every weekend has dedicated family time and often plans with friends will be canceled for family meet-ups. A positive of this is that family’s are really close and are more like friends than relatives.

But one thing I don’t get is the common occurrence of inserting an outsider into your family for an afternoon or an evening. I realise that the gesture is saying that you want the new person to get to know you in a closer way and feel comfortable within your family setting. But it doesn’t make sense to me.

(I must note that I am referring to friend friends, not boyfriends and girlfriends which of course need to spend more time with the family of their partner.)

Families have years, decades of history together. Stuff that you can never understand, thousands of stories that you need to learn, stuff that is intense and personal and cannot be understood from the outside. And bringing an outsider into that circle is exposing them as exactly that, an outsider. It’s obvious. They don’t know about Uncle Jo’s surgery or that time when little kristy went missing, they don’t know anything about this family. Why? Because its not their family.

Its great to chat with a friend’s parents, to see their background, to see where the similarities lie, but is it really necessary to introduce friends to your entire family and expect them to enjoy spending an extended amount of time together?

First of all its awkward, the outsider just listens to all the conversation without having anything much to contribute except “Oh, I went to Pucon too! Its beautiful!”...

Secondly, the friend, the outsider has made a connection with you because you have something in common or you get along well. But with your family they have nothing in common! Except you. If you want to spend time with your friend, you’d think you’d be with them and sharing about your lives, not listening to them and their aunty gossip about your cousin’s new boyfriend.

It might be possessive but I’d rather just spend time with the person I became friends with and keep it at that, try to develop a friendship with that person, rather than being distracted with random family members and expected to form bonds with everyone sharing my friend’s DNA.

I would much rather meet a bunch of someone’s friends, than their family. Maybe because they will be more similar to the person I first became friends with. I think it comes down to different ideas about family and friends. Lines drawn and cultural rules put in place.

Anyway, from my point of view, the family circle is a strange place to be as the outsider. I always appreciate the invitation and try as hard as I can, but its like being on a date with 10 people, all of which demand a good first impression!

Maybe that’s it! The friend is testing you out to see if you are worth it....

My Happy Place

Santiago is full of fabulous places; Cafes, restaurants, bars, parks, plazas, soccer fields and more. But the place that I feel most happy, most calm and strangely at home, is at a big consumerist haven... the mall.

They are everywhere and as globalisation takes over, they are becoming very alike, no matter the location. Malls in Australia, China (in the big cities) and Chile are amazingly comparable. You can see the same brands of clothing, food, cafes, even architectural features are sometimes similar.

When mall crawling I find myself knowing where everything is, even though I haven't been there before. The whole routine of parking the car, window shopping, drinking a boost juice and generally taking in the hustle-bustle environment is unusually soothing.

I also enjoy time outside in nature, in a library, having dinner in a restaurant, but the mall really sticks out as my happy place here in Santiago, Chile. I don't generally buy anything on my mall visits either. I think I must be a child of mall culture, consumerism at its peak.  How odd.

Cultural identity and other things

Cultural identity and knowing someone through different ‘cultural lenses’.

Recently I have had the opportunity to observe Native English speakers using Spanish and native Spanish speakers using English. Watching these interactions has made me wonder about cultural identity and the expression of one's personality through different languages in different places.

First of all: Can you change your culture?

One's personality is formed in the context of their culture. This culture is different for everyone. Often its associated with a country; Australian culture, Chilean culture, Chinese culture. And so if you grow up in a certain place your personality will be formed in the context of that place's cultural practices and conventions, and therefore will be forever connected to that culture.

So if you go to a new place can you change your culture and be as a local?

My thinking is no. Although you may change certain expectations, social behaviour, diet and routine, you cannot be separated from your original culture. You are adapting and learning new ways of living, but you are not changing your personality. You are not changing your culture and so not changing your personality. Your personality cannot be separated from your cultural background as it was formed in that context. So your personality is the same, but expressed through the ‘lens’ of a different cultural context.

Consequently for those interacting with you it may SEEM like you are different, like your personality is different. As you can adapt well to a new culture, it may seem as if that is your own culture. Learning how to walk the walk and talk the talk can project a different you, a you that fits better, more harmoniously, with the current cultural environment. That is the whole point of cultural education anyway, understanding, communication and harmony between people. But the fact is, that the new projection of you is not 100% truly you because it lacks your original cultural context.

So, if I know you in one context, cultural, linguistic or circumstantial, will I know you in another?

This is where my observations of the English and Spanish speakers come in. When speaking a language it is impossible to be disconnected with the culture of that language. When someone is talking in a foreign language they inevitably use cultural content such as turns of phrase, comments, and even jokes that they wouldn't use in their own language. This means they can be seen to portray a different personality by others. Spanish speakers who I have observed speaking both English and Spanish come across quite differently in the two languages. I'm sure I also seem different when I speak Spanish or Chinese. And I think the reason is that I didn't grow up in a Spanish or Chinese cultural environment.

The concept of ‘knowing someone’ is hard to define. If I know your favourite food and movie does that mean I know you? If I know your deepest darkest secret does that mean I know you? Hard to say. If I know you speaking English when your native tongue is Russian, does that mean I know you? The real you? If I know you as my maths teacher does that mean I know you? Well...I know one version of you, the one I interact with in a specific context. But how could I know you in other contexts? You will vary slightly in all other contexts, and in those other contexts to me you will not be 100% of what I know as ‘you’.

What if I know you in a variety of contexts?

Knowing people in a variety of contexts can be confusing. These contexts could be different languages, countries, or simply in a different relationship context. For example, my room mate is also my friend, so I see that person through two different ‘context lenses’. Is this situation more complicated or does it show depth and strength in our relationship? Maybe it just means that when I talk to that person I have to deal with two different relationship contexts and keep my expectations and behaviour within the role of ‘friend’ or ‘room mate’ depending on the situation.

If I then mix in a few different languages and a few different cultural backgrounds, the expectations and behaviours that I need to modify to suit each relationship context and each language/cultural context grow. Having a relationship with a number of cultural and language contexts is complicated, but if it survives, it also shows depth, flexibilty and strength of that relationship. Many people avoid interaction with others because of the complicated nature the relationship might have. Many won’t go out drinking with their bosses, because managing that relationship might be difficult. Many will avoid spending time with people who have different cultural backgrounds, because it could be hard to understand their opinions. Having relationships with one language, one culture and one relationship context can be easier for harmony to exist, but it doesn't always result in the most interesting or fulfilling relationships.

In the end, even if you know someone in 10 different contexts, you never know them 100%, and so trying to define them as “this type of person” or “that type of person” is impossible and helps no-one. I guess we should try to enjoy the surprises people reveal along the way, without them it’d be boring anyway, right?

Witnessing Culture Shock

The other night I met a fellow Australian here in Santiago. Not in an expat bar, not doing anything touristy, but at a small birthday celebration in the suburb of Macul. Everyone apart from myself and this guy were Chileans, and I was intrigued as to how he fit into the scene.

Over the course of the evening I got to know him and his story intrigued me.

This guy, we’ll call him Pablo, was born in New Zealand and moved to Australia when he was a one year old. His parents were Chilean and this was his first trip to Chile at the age of 30. He was a mechanic by trade, lived in Adelaide and other than New Zealand he had never been outside Australia.

Compared to most other expats Pablo was completely fresh to his current situation: being away from home, traveling, mixing with people of another culture, etc. I found his observations and opinions, along with his level of enthusiasm when he was talking, priceless.

They included:

• People are so different here. Everything is different.
• People are super sensitive about gift giving in Chile. “One time I was wearing a hat and someone gave me another hat but I didn’t put it on because I already had one on. Then they got mad. I didn’t know I had done anything wrong but people told me later I should have swapped the hats.”
• Alcohol is really cheap in Chile.
• It’s frustrating and tiring having to speak something other than your mother tongue all the time. “Its so nice to speak English with you guys!”
• He missed home a lot.
• People are constantly offering him food and help with things. It’s too much. 
• Portion sizes are bigger than Australia.
• People are so touchy here.
• Property is really cheap here.

Kiss or a Handshake (awkward)

Pablo was a typical aussie bloke. His slurred mumbling accent was perfect! It made me smile just listening to him talk about his rugby union team in Adelaide. (btw he thought Canberrans were super tough rugby-wise :) )

But the thing that was impressive about meeting this guy was realising that this experience was blowing his mind! He was going to remember every part of this trip. He’ll be telling his friends about it and how crazy it was for years to come.

Maybe coming to Chile could open his mind to other traveling opportunities, spark his curiosity about the world outside of Australia. How great would that be! Maybe he’ll be more open to engaging with the multicultural mix of people that live in Australia. More open to new Australians coming from other countries, because he has had a glimpse of what its like to be away from what you know and have to learn and adapt to a whole new way of life.

I am of the opinion (and I hope its not too far from the truth) that his experience outside of Australia will have a positive impact on his life in one way or another. He didn’t take the path of joining a tour group and seeing museums or backpacking and climbing mountains, he came with his mum to get to know where she came from by living in her old suburb, buying empanadas from the shop she used to and hanging out with his grandpa. Respect.

Time without action is useless

While waiting for my Chilean working visa to be approved over the last four months (It has now been approved! Yaaay!), I have had a huge amount of time on my hands and I have decided that I do not like it one bit!

When a person has nothing to do, no obligations, no structure, no schedule of any kind, just waiting for an undefined deadline they become very stagnant and inactive - mentally, its like they aren’t a real person with a real life anymore.

What’s more, when you don’t do much, you have nothing to talk about. No stories involving drama and suspense. The only thing you can talk about is how bored you are or other similar yet uninteresting topics, the weather for example.

Without planning that involves a time frame there is no progress, or at least it can feel that way. Also true if the time fame is just way too big. Having small time related goals/demands help keep a mind on track. That’s why all those little obligations you have are so great!

I never thought I’d say this, but all those things that you have to do, but don’t want to, are saving your life! Favours for random relatives, work dinners, family traditions, PTA meetings (I don’t have kids, but PTA meetings are boring, right?), basically all that extra stuff outside of work and stuff you want to do. Could even include work I suppose. (As shown in the diagram below).

Obligations

Be thankful for all those conversations that finish with “I’m sorry to leave but I have to go and ...” Unless you’re lying, they mean that you have stuff in your life, important stuff. Because let’s be honest, if it wasn’t that important you would take advantage of free will and choose not to do it.

That extra stuff shows character, depth, and human connection.

You can’t create it out of thin air either. You can’t instantly be expected to pick up some guy’s kid from after school care every Tuesday afternoon. Those obligations come from people trusting you, needing you and even loving you. From having meaningful relationships with others.

Enjoy your obligations!

A Little Bit of the South

Chile is a really long country, (over 4000 kilometres!) and as a result there are many differing landscapes and climates one can experience without crossing any international boarders. The flora and fauna also change dramatically throughout the 15 regions. After hearing so many positive reviews of the South of Chile I was pretty excited to be part of an eight person group trip to a little town called 'Puelo' a few hours away from Puerto Montt. 

Cabalgatas Rio Puelo

After flying for two hours, driving for 30 minutes, taking a three hour bus followed by a 45 minute ferry and a mini-van ride, the group was only just maintaining its cheery disposition. It definitely helped that on arrival to our new home we were greeted by a warm rustic cabin and a barbeque!

Cordero en palo

Cooking a ram, or cordero (not to be confused with a ewe, or oveja) is a traditional activity of the South of Chile and everyone was pretty enthusiastic to take part in this special tradition. It took more than four hours to cook, but it was well worth the wait. In the meantime there was ample opportunity for everyone to have a chat around a big fire in the quincho (a room with a barbequing area in the centre, the roof above is designed to let smoke out without letting rain in). Once the meat had been turned over and over for four hours, using the wooden poles that skewer the animal, it was ready for our hungry mouths. The meat tasted very differently than your standard lamb chops and it looked a white colour, almost like chicken. Delicious and tender.

The Start of the Hike

Hiking was a highlight. The track was amazingly entertaining. I found it similar to a choose your own adventure book. Will I trudge through the dense mud, will I follow a trail up onto a high walkway or will I swing on trees and jump from rock to rock until I reach that wooden bridge ahead? So many options, and all lead to a sense of childish freedom and delight.

Entertaining Tracks

Cows around Refugio La Junta

The campsite was a welcoming resting place after six hours of uphill hiking (climbing, more like). The cows hung around until the sun went down, then we were left to enjoy our evening by the fire. Wood collecting teams were sent out, fire builders were put to work and soon we had warmth and something to cook on. Nothing better than building your own fire.

Campsite

The humidity and generally cool temperatures of the South of Chile are aparent as soon as you step off the plane. One perk of all the rain is that everything is super green and luscious. I was amazed at the amount of water around and the life that it supported. Every rock had fluro moss or lichen growing on it, every tree trunk was home to seven other plants, every vine was covered, it was stunning.

Growth Everywhere

Rivers run constantly down from high mountain tops, filled with crystal clean water. I drank it without any issues and it tasted great. River beds were mainly filled with beautifully light coloured granite rocks and icey water.

Also staying at the Cabalgata Rio Puelo site was a middle aged Swiss man and a young Hungarian man. One interested in the fishing prospects of the South of Chile, the other working through Helpx and learning Spanish. The vibe was very relaxed, as a tiny town in the middle of mountains and rivers should be.

Over all it was great to get acquainted with another part of Chile. It was nice to know that all those people who rave on about the South of Chile were right. Definitely worth a visit.


Check out the Photos page for more shots of Puelo.

Puelo

Spanish Jokes

Baby Football, Santiago

As I was watching my boyfriend play soccer the other night I started to think of some soccer jokes.

How do you get a man to dance gracefully along a painted line, twisting and turning along the way? 

Put a soccer ball between his feet.

How do you start a fight in Chile? 

Forget to bring the ball to a football match.

Then that got me started on other jokes...

How many Chileans does it take to change a light bulb? 

Five. One to change the light bulb, one to bbq the meat, one to play the guitar, and two to go buy enough pisco and coke for the night.

A:Knock knock
B: Who’s there?
A: One.
B: One who?
A: Juan Carlo, Can you let me in? Olvidé mis llaves.

Why didn’t the Chilean girl go to the dance? 

Because she had no Juan to go with.

How many completos italianos does it take ruin a life? 

Trick question. None. They only improve lives.

Why do people hate TranSantiago? 

Because its crowded and unreliable. (psych!)

Then there’s this one based on this Enrique Iglesias song:

¿Qué hace Enrique Iglesias en un campo de trigo? 

Estar con trigo, vivir con trigo, bailar con trigo!

Well, there you go. I don't quite consider myself a comedian so forgive me if none of that amused you. Just a bit of nonsense to start your day! 

Have a good one :)

The Right Way

Ice Cream Metaphor

People can experience the same things differently, I get that. I eat an ice cream and I feel happy and satisfied, someone else will eat the exact same ice cream and be confused at the appeal of the cold milky snack and want to throw it in the bin. Maybe I work in an ice cream factory and am sick of eating the left over ice creams, or maybe I have never had an ice cream before and my first try is heavenly. Perspectives on the ice cream differ. Every single person experiences it differently and their experiences are all valuable no matter their background. The ice cream factory worker knows more about ice cream, but that doesn't make the experience of a first time ice cream taster less correct.

I started thinking about this concept of how valuable and authentic one experience is compared to another when I was reflecting on my own experience living in Chile. From travel blogs I have read recently, it seems that my situation is quite unique. Not many foreigners get to live inside another culture like I am right now.

"My Situation":

• Sharing an apartment with Chileans.
• Having only Chilean friends and acquaintances.
• Being immersed in Chilean culture whenever I'm not alone or on Skype.
• Using Spanish everyday to communicate my thoughts and feelings.

These things have their advantages and disadvantages. Living with locals does give you a different perspective and lets you see things that are way outside the Lonely Planet version of a country. But are they more real and valuable than the three day tour version?

Foreigner Bubble

When I lived in China for a total of about three years I never lived within Chinese culture the way I am living within Chilean culture now. Sure, I ate Chinese food regularly, I practiced my Chinese with locals, I encountered strange and interesting things about the culture, etc. However I was always experiencing these things from the outside. I didn't live with a Chinese family, I didn't have many Chinese friends, so I found parts of my own culture within China to relate to and enjoy. Basically I lived in a foreigner bubble version of China.

I'd like to point out that I had a fabulous time in that bubble. I made amazing friends, experienced new things, and learnt a lot about the world. The foreigner bubble isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it did keep me at an arm's length from the country I was living in.

This realisation of how different my 'foreigner life' in China was compared to my current 'local life' in Chile makes me wonder if my Chinese experience would have been more valuable and authentic if I was immersed in everyday Chinese life. Definitely, my Chinese language skills would be much more advanced. After three months in Chile with no prior Spanish training (except a few months on Memrise) I have conversational Spanish and a basic hold on grammar. Getting to that level in Chinese took me three years. Another difference is that I would have learnt more about Chinese culture from observing those around me 24 hours a day rather than reading about it in a book or hearing another expat's perspective on a certain tradition.

On the other hand I wouldn't have connections all around the world, like I do now, if I lived in a local context, and I probably still wouldn't know that Turkmenistan exists. And maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't have enjoyed myself as much. I wonder whether I would have kept on returning to China after an intense cultural experience? Being all of 14 when I first visited China, I think I would have been quite shocked at the prospect of being put into a completely Chinese environment and that may not have had the best impact on my excitement for China. But who knows.

Living like a Local

The fact is that living as a local, for all its value, is hard. First of all, how do you get into this situation? It's not an easy feat. I remember having a deep desire to connect with locals and share with them in China. I looked for avenues to achieve this goal- hobbies, clubs, language exchanges, etc. It doesn't always work out how you think it will, and it requires a lot of persistence to find a local who:

a) isn't using you for English speaking practice,
b) is cool, and
c) wants to hang out with you.

I guess that's why a lot of people pay good money to do home-stay programs and immersion internships. (My first solo trip to China was through a volunteer organisation, Lattitude Global Volunteering.) My Chilean pathway to living in a local environment was less planned: I fell in love with a Chilean. He has been kind enough to show me his country and I am grateful everyday for his help in understanding his homeland and its people. I know I am very lucky to be able to share this experience with him. Many people don't get the chance to live like a local when they travel overseas and their experiences contain completely different content because of that.

Your Version

Imagine all the different impressions foreigners can have of a single country. Your thoughts on China or New Zealand, for example, are almost certainly going to be different to mine. Some people travel on tours, others with their parents, some backpack without plans. Budgets differ, time frames differ, reasons for travelling differ too. Which version is the best? Which combination produces the most reliable presentation of a country? All of them happen, all are true, yet they result in different experiences, good and bad, and varied images of a place. Local is one way. Foreigner bubble is another way. Tourist another.

Cajón Del Maipo - The Perfect Barbecue

If you are looking for a peaceful escape close to Santiago, Chile, Cajón Del Maipo is what you’re looking for. Only an hour outside the city, this beautiful valley has many different picnic areas and riverside retreats for soaking in the natural ambiance. I visited a picnic area called "El Manzano" and I can honestly say out of all the barbecues I have experienced in Chile so far, and believe me there have been a lot, this was my favourite. In four words: quiet, green, fresh, natural.

Buses come out here for tourists and there’s heaps of room for parking cars. There are barbecue areas (without the grill, so you might want to bring your own), tables, chairs, and bathrooms too.

Here are some pictures so you can get a better idea.

Amazing Scenery

Beer, chips, shade. The essentials.

Four person barbecue, cooked with charcoal

Lovely (freezing) water cascading down off the mountain tops

Up above. See anything?

Barbecues and picnics are great aren't they? Especially in a place like this. All you do is cook, eat, chat, take in some sun and let the good times roll. Looking forward to the Chilean Summer.

Learning Spanish in Chile : The First Two Months

Learning a new language is a big task, whatever the language. It is also my favourite part of travelling. Although it can be tiring and slightly overwhelming at times, communicating with someone using a whole new language system is very rewarding. In my opinion, living immersed in the language you are learning is the quickest way to learn it because your environment encourages you (forces you) to engage with the language almost all day and night. This is great as it gives you instant motivation to practice the language and improve your language skills rapidly. As soon as you step outside there are opportunities to practice, it almost takes more energy to not speak and read and communicate with locals.

Learning Spanish in Chile has been interesting. A lot of people, even Chileans themselves, say that they speak Spanish badly. Definitely the accent here is quite different from the CD ROM that comes with your standard Spanish textbook, with the omission of certain sounds, a huge amount of slang and a kind of closed mouth form. However as an Australian, I can hardly complain about all these things. Australian English is often described quite similarly. The Chilean accent is just that, an accent, after a while your ears will get use to the sound.

Looking back over the first two months of my time in Chile, I have definitely come a long way since I arrived. My Spanish learning journey started with my first hot shower... I remember looking down at the taps and seeing an “F” and a “C”. I already knew the word for cold, frio, so that was easy, and I thought I knew the word for hot, calor, done and done. However during the next few days I noticed that things like water, food and heaters were described as caliente, and so I put two and two together and understood that the C in the shower was for caliente not calor! Am I blowing your mind right now? Ok, just let me get past my first jet lag influenced epiphany… This was when I realised that everything was going to be in Spanish from now on, even small details like hot and cold taps.

In the first few weeks of living in Chile I noticed things like this everywhere and it was so much fun because my level of Spanish was so low that my rate of improvement felt so fast: There was nowhere to go but up! Everywhere I looked were new words. Driving into town I couldn’t help but read every single sign I saw, my eyes were in hyper drive, as my brain attempted guessing the meaning of the passing shopfront of Santiago.

After a while I realised I needed a structure way to study and so I bought a book: “Easy Spanish - Step by Step” by Barbara Bregstein. This was a good choice and I would recommend the book to anyone at a beginner Spanish level. I did a few chapters a week and in less than a month I was able to have basic conversations (with very little grammar), and I was being understood without playing charades, which is always a good feeling.

At that point my listening skills were way ahead of my speaking, reading and writing skills as I was exposed to so much conversation every day that I guess I absorbed new words by osmosis. This put me in a unique mute position. I could grasp the gist of what was being said (with a few holes here and there) but I was unable to join the conversation and express my opinions and experiences. Surprisingly, it takes more than a month to be fluent in Spanish! So without the gift of the Spanish gab I took to observing Chilean culture from an outsider’s perspective and tried to learn as much as possible. I also started this blog to make sure I didn’t forget my observations.

After two months (right now) I am able to have slightly more intermediate conversations using conjugations in the present tense and using a small selection of verbs in the past tense. I have also learnt common phrases and slang to throw into conversation to fake fluency. I think I fool some people, although having blonde hair doesn’t help the charade...

To validate my claims of speaking a bit of Spanish I present to you the proof: Last night I made a friend. A Chilean friend who doesn’t speak a word of English! I proved that I can have a 15 minute conversation with a local without any misunderstanding. Very satisfying. It’s things like that, connecting with people face to face, that motivate me to keep going, to get better so that I can understand my new friend better and learn something from them.

Making these small connections and sharing with people from different walks of life is a big part of why I enjoy travelling. It helps me to understand the world and reflect on my own life with greater clarity.

Expectations

They can change everything.

Having high expectations can lower satisfaction with reality. Having low expectations can increase satisfaction with reality.

Doing research to inform these expectations can decrease the chance of dissatisfaction, however then you lose the feeling of surprise. But then again, its pretty hard to calculate the result of a surprise, good or bad, other factors such as likes and dislikes and sense of humour also contribute. Anyway, back to expectations.

Expectations change with experience and repetition over time.

The first time you are unsatisfied with an experience that didn’t meet your expectations you feel like crap. The second time you have a similar experience your expectations will align more closely with reality and you won’t feel as crap. The more you experience, the more realistic your expectations will be. Once you have had a similar experience 10 times you might be prepared to really enjoy that experience whereas before you might have been frustrated and annoyed, or at least uncomfortable.

Do you remember the first time you played Mario Kart? Try to think back. Do you remember turning the controller upside down to the right and left to try to help you make the tight corners on the race track? Well I do... But did it actually help? No. And the fact that it didn’t do anything, even though you were using this physical technique, was really frustrating and annoying. After playing the game for a while you started to learn other ways to stay on the track such as steeling with the joystick, braking on corners and not hitting bombs or skidding on bananas. Then you started to learn from your mistakes and enjoyed playing the game more and more until you fell in love with the game. BUT THEN the wii comes out and they tell you that you can use the physical turning method! This just messes with your expectations all over again. However in time you get use to it and can’t help but love Mario Kart just as much as before.

You can only change your expectations through experience.

Its tempting to think to yourself “ok, I’ll keep my expectations low, because I don’t want to be disappointed”, I have done this before and have expected it to work. Funny thing is that your brain knows that you are trying to trick yourself so unfortunately your expectations don’t change at all. It doesn't work.

If I am excited to see a movie and I think it will be awesome, I can only change this expectation if I have other information; like if someone tells me its a dull movie, then I can take that experience and put it together with my expectations and they will be modified. If I know that my expectations are high and I want to lower them, this is irrelevant, I can’t change them until I know something that will affect them. This works well for movie marketing people when they are putting together a trailer/preview for a new film. If they are good at their jobs, they can give you information that will increase your expectations and make you want to see the movie and ultimately, give them money.

Sometimes your expectations don’t help you come to love a video game or convince you to pay money for a terrible movie with a great trailer. Sometimes your expectations can affect your everyday routine and make a big difference. I have experienced this difference after arriving in a new country and settling in. Adapting to life in a different culture requires patience. It takes time to realign your expectations with reality, and this can be a pleasant or an uncomfortable process depending on your personal culture and your expectations of the country you are adapting to.

How do expectations affect your life?

Chile and Australia: Cultural Differences

The South American country of Chile is a long way from Australia and naturally there are quite a few cultural differences between the two places. From living in Santiago for two months, below are 13 differences that I have noticed. Don't agree? Have more to add? Leave a comment. Tell me your thoughts!

Completo Italiano with Mini Empanadas

 1. Eating habits - 

• 8am: Typical Breakfast: bread with cheese
• 1:30pm: Typical Lunch: Meat Carbs Meat Carbs Meat Carbs and Salad . Usually the biggest meal of the day
• 8pm: Typical Supper: Bread and cheese or eggs. Very light.
• Avocado and tomato are also extremely popular for a sandwich at any time of the day.
• Tea is taken without milk.

2. Socialising - Aussies will often meet for a coffee to catch up on life for an hour or so. For Chileans this is unacceptable, a minimum of five hours should be set aside for any social gathering. I have been to a bbq that lasted for 14 hours. It can be quite intense.

3. There is so much English music on the radio in Chile, people know English songs from The Beatles to the Police to the Foo Fighters. Mainstream stations in Australia hardly ever have foreign language content, except maybe gangnam style or the macarena.

4. Outside + standing up at night. An essential Chilean experience is a bbq or 'asado' with friends or family. This involves building a fire in a bbq with wood or coal outside, waiting for it to get to the right temperature, cooking a great amount of meat and eating it straight from the grill when its juicy and delicious! Meanwhile everyone is standing around drinking pisco for literally hours. Doesn't matter if its cold outside, People like to hang outside.

5. Junk food is relatively healthy in Chile. Completo italiano, churrasco? They come with avocado and tomato. Sopaypillas? They’re made from pumpkin! 

6. Almost everyone smokes tobacco and its very common for young people to smoke marijuana together. This might be a reason why they dig hanging outside.

7. Talking bullshit- yeah, we both like to do it, but its different. Chileans tell long crazy stories, Aussies are very sarcastic.

8. Drink preferences - Chileans love pisco. I mean love love love pisco. will drink it every night for the rest of their lives. The 'promo' one buys for a night out includes a 2 litre bottle of coke and a bottle of Chilean Pisco. (That Peruvian stuff is apparently VERY different)

Also wine. Waiters will ask if you want wine, and if you say yes, they will bring red without asking. Wine = red wine in Chile.

9. Sports - Football is like a religion in Chile. You won’t find any cricket or netball comps here! Also Chileans work a lot, their hours are much longer, so fitting in sport and exercise isn't the number one priority.

10. Gender roles - although it varies from household to household, generally I've noticed women of around 50 years take care of more feminine activities such as cleaning, cooking etc.

11. Kisses on the cheek to say hello. Even kids do it in Chile! I find myself forgetting to initial this ritual probably offending and making bad impressions. Oops!

12. Chileans are generally open to commitment, helping, being involved as soon as they are asked. Aussies can be distant when asked if they will help out of be part of a new business idea or plan, needing more time to decide. 

13. Dogs in the streets. They are cute, friendly, and their only home is the streets of Santiago. I guess Australia’s snipping regulations are pretty strict.

For more information on Chilean culture check out the following links:

• http://www.reachtoteachrecruiting.com/guides/chile/chilean-culture/
• http://www.kwintessential.co.uk/resources/global-etiquette/chile.html
• http://cachandochile.wordpress.com/
• http://wanderingtrader.com/travel-blog/chile-travel-blog/
• http://fathomaway.com/photostory/local-obsessions-chilean-street-art/
• http://www.expatexchange.com/chile/liveinchile.html

Mil Tambores - Valparaiso

Hot Hippy Spirit

Is your culture cold or warm?

 A common way to describe people is by temperature.  “They are very cold people”, “Everyone here is so warm”. What does it take to be part of the cold group or the warm group? Is one group better than the other? Why do people use this adjective like this?

I think many of us have heard certain nationalities described as “cold”. However, I don’t think this is a racist expression, but one which might show a lack of understanding and also a specific recognition that a cultural difference exists between you and the person you are describing. Throughout my life I have often heard “cold” refer to Russians or Eastern Europeans and not knowing anything about Russian life or culture, I unknowingly accepted this as a fitting description. Recently I have heard Chileans describing Chinese people as cold. This labelling of Chinese people as cold made me start to question the expression, its meaning and validity, as I, having lived in and studied Chinese culture, would not describe them as cold.

People being labelled as “cold” could have something to do with the climate of a certain country or region. From what I can tell Russia is very cold in winter, pictures of Siberia spring to mind. Maybe people in colder climates spend more time indoors with their families rather than outside with others and this affects their ‘warmth’ or closeness with others when they see them. However there are quite a few exceptions to this climate stereotype. For example, I have never heard Canadians be described as cold, and I know they get a fair amount of snow every year.

It could have something to do with your style of interaction with other people. Introverted people can be described as cold because they might not desire to communicate or to spend extended periods of time with other people in “conventional” environments. Shy people too, people who don’t speak that specific language well, people who are sick or tired and so remain distant. In this way ‘cold’ is used to distance certain styles of interaction while the more “mainstream” styles are interpreted as correct. Sometimes this use of ‘cold’ is specific to individuals rather than a large group of people which is interesting. The word cold can be used in both contexts without question. Stereotyping is so vague that one word can describe an entire group of people; millions of citizens, and these simple, one word descriptions, images and perspectives all influence the way we view and interact with other cultures.

It could also refer to physical interaction. Cold weather is also said to be ‘frigid’, being unable to enjoy sexual contact. So extrapolating from that, people who don’t touch or kiss as a natural social behaviour tend to be described as cold. In this sense physical contact is interpreted as a positive personality trait.

Maybe cold is a word that expresses a negative alternative to ones cultural comfort zone. I’m thinking that generally people from ‘warm’, touchy, louder cultures are the ones that use this word, ‘cold’, as a negative adjective. Why not use the word ‘shy’ or ‘reserved’? Probably because people are somewhat afraid of the unknown culture they are dealing with and so tend to push it away with a type of insult.

For all we know touching and kissing (for greetings or during a friendly conversation) could be a dangerous habit for spreading infection. Talking a lot, asking a lot of questions and loudly, could be disrespectful to a host or push boundaries of relationships in certain cultures. Until you have put in the time to figure out a culture, you will never know. If people studied other cultures they wouldn’t see the way people act as strange and negative, they would just know that in that culture there are different ways of expressing your mood and personality.

The words we use to describe others shed light on our own cultures, personalities, perspectives and knowledge.

Entrepreneurial Spirit in China, Chile and Australia

I find it fascinating to travel and learn about different cultures because it helps me to understand the world better. Conceptualising theories in from a textbook is not useful until you know that it is real somewhere. I have learnt so much from living outside of my own culture and I recommend it to everyone who has the opportunity. 

Entrepreneurship

The vibe that I have felt when in developing countries like China and Chile is one of movement, motivation and opportunities. It rubs of after a while and you feel excited just to be part of it. So many people are finding new ways to be prosperous, to improve their living standards, to connect with the rest of the globe and think outside the box. 

When I lived in China I found that working hard and business networking was a part of life, a vital part. People were open to ideas and opportunities coming their way and they set aside a significant amount of their personal time and energy for pursuing those opportunities. Apart from cultural tendencies for making contacts and helping people with favours, the fact that the economy was growing rapidly seemed to influence their view of their potential in that environment and motivated them to take advantage of the available opportunities. 

I also met many foreign expats in China who were thinking of how to open their own businesses so they could connect with the opportunities of the Chinese market. Some of them were also from developing countries. I really admire all of their views and motivation for creating something from nothing. At the the same time they are willing to take risks for the chance to succeed, and they aren’t afraid to fail and learn from mistakes.

In Chile I have found a similar phenomenon. Young Chileans are very open to meeting new contacts, to network and talk about their ideas. Many people have their own small businesses and are working out the issues along the way with the support of their families and friends. But the point is they are willing to work hard to be their own boss and make something for themselves. When networking, the way Chileans and Chinese people explain their ideas is with passion, with authority and with a little bit of “fake it til you make it”. This skill is very useful in life, not only in business but socially too. Having confidence in your thoughts and projects shows your motivation and planning, the time you have put into something and how far you are willing to go to succeed, your commitment. It also helps you develop your powers of persuasion and diplomacy: essential skills to have to get what you want. As a non native speaker of both Mandarin and Spanish, I have coined this “whoever talks the longest wins”. The more you can talk about a topic, the more information you can impart on the other person in the conversation, the more you you know, the smarter and more well informed you are. This positions you better to gain and use contacts. It is definitely a skill I need to master.

However Australian culture is different. We have tall poppy syndrome, we don’t want to hear someone go on and on about how much they know. Instead of being impressed we might be hesitant to cooperate with them, we might interpret the noise as compensation for lack of actual knowledge or credibility. Moreover from my experience in Australia so far I see less entrepreneurial spirit in young people. Most people are interested in securing a well paying job by studying at a advanced level and working their way up the chain (while paying off their Uni loans). In Australia this is achievable and is very secure, so in reality this plan is a smart one, however the environment discourages new businesses being created and level of competition in the market. In general the population is risk adverse and would rather take the safe pathway to financial security. Now, I don’t pretend to be an expert of economics, so I would be very interested if anyone has other comments on this.

I’m sure that government policy, laws, media, culture, location and many other factorrs also influence the amount of business growth and entrepreneurial spirit in a country. As Prahni from Seachange says “Everything is connected to everything else”.   

Welcome to Santiago

 Welcome to Santiago

You know, living in another country is kind of challenging. There's the new food, the new language, the new culture, the new music, the new transport, the new job, the new people... I mean, its a lot to take in. But if its so hard then why do people do it? What makes people look for the opportunity to change their whole world and start fresh? 

Obviously there are a bunch of different reasons and it would be boring to give you all the answers right away. Instead, I hope to share some of my thoughts on the subject with you through this blog.

This blog is going to be primarily about keeping track of experiences, revalations and learning in general which will all take place in and around the South American country of Chile. So let me introduce myself...

I am Australian, have lived in China for three years and now have started a new chapter of my life in Santiago, Chile. After only six weeks, I have already learnt so much from this country and its people. I have been bombarded with cultural differences I didn't see coming and I am enthusiastic to tell people about everything.

I aim to be objective, curious, positive, adventurous, flexible, diligent and easy going. Hope you find something you can relate to along the way. Leave me comments if you wish, or not. 

Anyway, I'll leave you with a picture and once more say welcome to Santiago, Chile! (Link: Lonely Planet intro)